


Server Name has been changed to HELLHOLE!

by CreativeUsermeme



Category: Loki: Agent of Asgard, Marvel (Comics), Young Avengers (Comics)
Genre: Discord Au, Dungeons & Dragons 5th Edition, F/F, M/M, aroace verity, loki and verity are qprs, loki uses they/them in this, no gameplay but they talk about it a lot, references to critical role, slightly crack fic, they just talk thats it oops
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-19
Packaged: 2019-02-16 11:42:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,948
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13053306
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CreativeUsermeme/pseuds/CreativeUsermeme
Summary: The Young Avengers and friends have much better things to do with their time than bicker like teenagers, play Dungeons and Dragons, and completely ignore their responsibilities. Too bad they can't be bothered to do those things.





	1. Chapter 1

_[Loki stop changing my fucking name] is now online!_

Agent of Assgard: finally!!!!! verity verity verity okay you know how you love me the most ever and i’m your favorite???

Loki stop changing my fucking name: No, because America’s my favorite, but sure, I’ll humor you.

Queen of this HELLHOLE: sorry v but i’m taken

ranger of the north: <3 love you bb

Queen of this HELLHOLE: <3 love you too princess

teddy bear: and they say we’re annoying?

Agent of Assgard: wow back to the subject

_[Loki stop changing my fucking name] has changed their name to [Code Name Verity]_

Code Name Verity: Agreed.

Agent of Assgard: okay so…. d&d. 5e. we need a rogue in our party

ranger of the north: ive told you like 20 times im willing to multiclass into fighter/rogue but whatever

Code Name Verity: No.

teddy bear: called it

~magic lad~: Excuse me husband dearest but who told you she’d say no????

Queen of this HELLHOLE: WHAT

Noh-Varr: Did you two get married while we weren’t looking?

ranger of the north: holy fuck

~magic lad~: ?

teddy bear: i now realize that i never told you all that were engaged

Code Name Verity: Congratulations!

Agent of Assgard: awwwww congrats kids

Noh-Varr: I would argue that many of our bodies have been around for longer than yours, Loki, but the sentiment of celebration stands.

~magic lad~: Teddy i love you more than anybody else in the world but did it ever occur to you that perhaps informing our friendgroup that were engaged is slightly important!?

teddy bear: i’ve been busyyyyyyyyyy

~magic lad~: With what?

teddy bear: i’m rewriting emon’s backstory

Agent of Assgard: teddy i told you he’s fine with a smaller history

teddy bear: i havent played dnd in years and i know i can do better

Code Name Verity: You’ve already dragged these two in?

Agent of Assgard: what did you expect

Queen of this HELLHOLE: i’m still in shock that they’re engaged holy hell

Agent of Assgard: okay listen were in blingdenstone now but david had to leave the session because he’s trying to get a job since the security thing didnt work out and he was our rogue and we need one still

Code Name Verity: David?

~magic lad~: prodigy

ranger of the north: verity i dont think youve met him but hes cool

Code Name Verity: What’s in it for me?

Agent of Assgard: three fuck off loki passes and a pf changs giftcard

Code Name Verity: Hm.

Queen of this HELLHOLE: if you join the party then i’ll take away their nickname privileges

Agent of Assgard: what?!?!??!

Code Name Verity: Deal.

Agent of Assgard: i didn’t agree to this!! no!!!

~magic lad~: you can still change your own nickname you realize

Agent of Assgard: i know but i cant change veritys!!!

ranger of the north: d e a l

Agent of Assgard:  3:<

Queen of this HELLHOLE: im going to bed now have fun bickering

ranger of the north: love you babe!

Queen of this HELLHOLE: love you too princess <3 <3 <3

_[Queen of this HELLHOLE] is now offline._

teddy bear: billy and i are probably gonna go to bed now too

Agent of Assgard: have fun wink wink

~magic lad~: You know for a fact he didnt mean it like that

teddy bear: night!

_[~magic lad~] is now offline._

_[teddy bear] is now offline._

Noh-Varr: I, for one, think it’s a good idea for Verity to join the party.

Agent of Assgard: thank you

Code Name Verity: See you tomorrow, dorks.

_[Code Name Verity] is now offline._

Agent of Assgard: one last time i guess

_[Code Name Verity] has had their name changed to [Little Ingenue] by [Agent of Assgard]._

Noh-Varr: America won’t like that.

Agent of Assgard: whatever

Agent of Assgard: what time is it for you anyway

Noh-Varr: UCT 14:00.

Agent of Assgard: so space o clock

Noh-Varr: Something like that, yes.

Agent of Assgard: guess ill just go to sleep now night


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> angst out of nowhere?? in my fic???? it's more likely than you think

Agent of Assgard: alright fuckos so once american girl doll gets online we can get started

Little Ingenue: I’m sorry, what?

Agent of Assgard: america

Little Ingenue: No, I understood your contrived nickname. Why are you calling us, and I quote, “fuckos?”

~magic lad~: Because theyre fucking loki and theyre like that

Agent of Assgard: wow i didnt know i was fucking myself

~magic lad~: I meant that youre a confusing little shit and youre weird as hell

Agent of Assgard: you love me

~magic lad~: No

teddy bear: no

ranger of the north: nope

Little Ingenue: No.

Noh-Varr: The common consensus is a negative one.

Agent of Assgard: for that im breaking out the two headed storm giant fuck all of you

teddy bear: thanks for the warning im attuning emons helm to lightning resistance

Agent of Assgard: when the hell did you get that??

teddy bear: you gave it to me

~magic lad~: Technically it was sold to him by a shopkeep but yeah

Agent of Assgard: oh

Agent of Assgard: right

Agent of Assgard: lemme just

Agent of Assgard: siri pull up 5e frost giant stats

_[Queen of this HELLHOLE] is now online!_

Agent of Assgard: there we go!!!!!!

Little Ingenue: So, character introductions?

Agent of Assgard: yup

teddy bear: my dude emon is a half-elf fighter of level 4 and he likes to stab things

~magic lad~: I play a tiefling warlock named song of lvl 4 that is very tired with the rest of the party

ranger of the north: i play clarity the human fighter whos from neverwinter and used to be a knight

Queen of this HELLHOLE: i play dwarven cleric/paladin multi of lvl 5

Agent of Assgard: gotta include the name america its the best part

Queen of this HELLHOLE: acirema

Little Ingenue: Wait, that’s… America backwards.

Agent of Assgard: I KNOW ITS WONDERFUL

Queen of this HELLHOLE: its probably the only time ive ever made them happy

Agent of Assgard: and ever will

Agent of Assgard: anyhow!!! verity if you please???

Little Ingenue: Fine. I play Haldia, the Wood Elf rogue, level four. She’s only in it for the money, and feels personally spited by the universe’s narrator.

Agent of Assgard: oof

Agent of Assgard: that hurts verity

Little Ingenue: She does. I don’t. Not yet, at least.

Agent of Assgard: yes maam

Agent of Assgard: so the links at roll20.net/join/session_superhighintensityteam

Little Ingenue: That stands for S. H. I. T.

Agent of Assgard: correct

Queen of this HELLHOLE: its a reference to some show that billy likes

~magic lad~: Critical role is not just some show it is a masterpiece of storytelling and one of the best campaigns to grace this dimension and its dmed by the va of mccree

teddy bear: out of all of the references you couldve made you chose the episode 80 something scanlan one off

teddy bear: there are much better jokes i promise

~magic lad~: I would like to fist the dragon

teddy bear: in the darkness i say fuck

~magic lad~: Your secret is safe with my indifference

teddy bear: buttflap hanging i exact my revenge screaming your soul is now forfeit

Queen of this HELLHOLE: royal decree its time to stop referencing nerd shit and play dungeons and dragons

ranger of the north: darling i love you but you do realize what you just said

Queen of this HELLHOLE: i play dnd but at least i dont quote a show in which one of the main characters shits on every bed hes seen

~magic lad~: I knew you watched it you lying trash

Agent of Assgard: america isnt trash shes wonderful and the queen of this place

Queen of this HELLHOLE: either you suddenly love me or you want admin privs back

Agent of Assgard: guilty as charged im suddenly deeply in love with you and will steal you away from kate

ranger of the north: i will fight you?????

Agent of Assgard: come at me

ranger of the north: i didnt trust you betrayed us and i still dont trust you now because i know that under that funny little facade youre still a fucking bastard who wouldnt know loyalty if it hit them in the face

Queen of this HELLHOLE: babe thats a bit much

Agent of Assgard: no shes right

ranger of the north: thats it

ranger of the north: youre not gonna fight that

Agent of Assgard: it was massively shitty of me to betray you to mother and i honestly am still a fucking bastard

Little Ingenue: Lie. You're more loyal than about anybody I've met.

Agent of Assgard: verity i love you but you think way too much of me if you still believe that

Agent of Assgard: i literally brought ragnarok and directly ended the universe

Little Ingenue: Only to bring it back in front of the Elder Ones. And reconstruct it  _exactly_ the way it was, no changes at all.

~magic lad~: Okay what the fuck we never heard about this

Agent of Assgard: it was a while ago

Little Ingenue: By which they mean it was about two months ago.

~magic lad~: Loki i couldnt remake the universe and ive literally wished the universe to make things happen and it worked

Agent of Assgard: teeeeeeeeechnically im a god still

Agent of Assgard: still? again? i dont know i got a power boost after dying and then coming back

Agent of Assgard: loki new and improved god of stories and mischief; moonking and mother of monsters; the closer of the final page and seer of the void; mistress of things unknown and father of flame and ice

Little Ingenue: They made up the "Seer of the Void" part, but the rest are vaguely accurate.

teddy bear: so our dm... is literally the god of dm'ing

Agent of Assgard: and also god of mischief, chaos, evil, the terrors below and the ultimate seidrmaster

Queen of this HELLHOLE: chico youre embarassing yourself

Agent of Assgard: point

Agent of Assgard: anyhow dnd yes were doing that now no emotional troubles here and things we need to talk about nope

Little Ingenue: Are you trying to make my eyeballs combust from making them read so much bullshit?

Queen of this HELLHOLE: verity's right lokes

Agent of Assgard: i dont wanna talk unless its about the campaign again

_[Agent of Assgard] has changed their name to [Your DM]_

~magic lad~: Loki talk to us

Your DM: what. did i just. say.

teddy bear: loki hes right

Your DM: i dont want to talk right now! please can we just play some fucking fantasy games!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bit of an interlude here

_[ranger of the north#5853] has direct-messaged [Agent of Assgard#0616]!_

ranger of the north: listen loki im sorry for what i said

Agent of Assgard (Your DM): im really not in the mood to talk

Agent of Assgard (Your DM): besides it was true

Agent of Assgard (Your DM): so whatever

ranger of the north: i still want to apologize

ranger of the north: im gonna leave you alone now

* * *

 

_[ranger of the north#5853] has direct-messaged [Willis89#7691]!_

ranger of the north: is loki okay

Willis89 (Little Ingenue): They´re frustrated, but I think they´ll be fine. It happens sometimes.

ranger of the north: fine

* * *

_[teddy bear#1492] has direct-messaged [kaplan2#8302]!_

kaplan2 (~magic lad~): Everything okay babe?

teddy bear: im worried i messed up

kaplan2(~magic lad~): Its gonna be okay

kaplan2(~magic lad~): Promise

teddy bear: id say that that doesnt work but also you can literally change the universe to your whims so fine

kaplan2(~magic lad~): Love you

teddy bear: love you too

 


End file.
